Terry Tibbs Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 VIP experience talk to me. Terry Tibbs, the owner of the Tibbs Motor Company is providing a VIP experience you will never forget, this Saturday 10th July. The venue Prince of Wales public house, Cardiff. I have some very special guests lined up for the occasion. My great friend Pav Pavitt will be alongside me, Pav Pavitt has more experience of hosting VIP speedway parties then young Benji Barker has pimples on his back. He's a geezer with tasty line schmateh and the spiel to match, Owner of Pav Pavitt Premium Phonelines Limited, you don't just jump into bed with Pav Pavitt, you take Pav Pavitt out to lunch, you wine and dine him, you give him an oil massage and then he gives you one weeks free access to Sky Channel 905, Red Hot Mums! Now talking of red hot mums, my great friend Gemini will be on hand, to give a hand, yes an oily hand to those wanting a little rub down. She is setting up her massage table in the men's toilets, just give my little Nigerian friend £2 for a spray of his Diesel After Shave and he'll let you into the disabled cubicle to meet Gemini. Also in attendance will be Main Man Rogers, a must meet for any youngsters, who need advice and guidance. He's great with kids, if you need a bedtime story read to them, Main man Rogers is your man. Johnny C didn't get to where he was today without Main Man Rogers' stories of Enid Blyton's Famous Five. Alongside Main Man Rogers will be Lord Bryn Williams, he is available to give fashion tips, especially those over 50, who feel they have become a little stale in their Wulf Sport jackets. I've agreed with the landlord of the Prince of Wales that Krzysztof Stojanowski's caravan can be parked in the back garden of the pub, Pav Pavitt is towing it over on the 8.36am ferry from Cowes to Southampton on Saturday and at 2.45pm on Saturday afternoon One Dart Pearson will be sat on the sofa of the caravan accepting visits from excited fans for an autograph. If you are lucky he will give you a signed picture of his great friend Co Stompe the Dutch darting legend. Krzysztof Stojanowski will be available himself for pictures on the camp bed that Lord Bryn Williams kindly donated back in 2005. Pictures will be taken by Lord Bryn Williams' chauffer and aide Big Chris, just £5 each or two for £12. All guests will get free entry to our , second prize a bedtime story with Main Man Rogers and third prize 4 laps on Chris Mills' bike, don't you go twisting the throttle too hard though. The friend of stars Steven Shovlar will be on hand to sign copies of his best sellingpublication Dorset Shipwrecks, price is usually £14.95 but for one day only on Saturday, £18.50 and a you get to sit on Steve Shovlar's lap whilst Big Chris snaps you, if he's busy in Krzysztof Stojanowski's caravan then you'll have to wait and chat with Semion who has kindly offered to take the money on Steve Shovlar's behalf. Entry to my exclusive area is just £250 and that includes a glass of vintage champagne donated by Main Man Rogers he'd bought it for the league title win of the Mildenhall Fen Tigers in 2008, those bloody Germans let him down so badly and don't even speak to him about the Finnish lads. However, if you talk to me, tickle my chin, donate some Vaseline for Gemini, introduce me to the Russian lads' mum I'll let you in for £500. Unless your name's Silver Bee, then entry for you my friend is 50p, as long as you wear your dentures, don't want any of those olives stuck in your teeth do we. No dentures, no entry. That's why they call me Terry Tibbs, much love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandie Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 Absolutely brilliant!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hagonshocker Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 Gotta be worth a go with the chance of Co Stompe's autograph!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dietbowers Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 Mr Tibbs is a sandwich short of a picnic,but it`s quality stuff none the less Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starman2006 Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 I used to read the Famous five books when i was a kid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lucifer sam Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midnight_Lady Posted July 6, 2010 Report Share Posted July 6, 2010 As we say up here...pure kwality Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starman2006 Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 (edited) Gotta be worth a go with the chance of Co Stompe's autograph!! Play up Stompe, Stompe play up!! Good man, he's a Pompey fan!!! Edited July 7, 2010 by Starman2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beeone Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 The big question is, who is looking after Gemini's dogs while she is on massage duty?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemini Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 (edited) Now talking of red hot mums, my great friend Gemini will be on hand, to give a hand, yes an oily hand to those wanting a little rub down. She is setting up her massage table in the men's toilets, just give my little Nigerian friend £2 for a spray of his Diesel After Shave and he'll let you into the disabled cubicle to meet Gemini. Excuse me!! So what happened to the luxury apartment in The Angel hotel that you promised me? If you think you can just stick me in some smelly men's toilets you can think again as I want to attract some famous names like Middlo, Colin Pratt, Alun Rossiter not riff raff like Steve Shovlar, Colin Cooke, Silver Bee and the like. You have two days to sort it out otherwise I won't be turning up and you can forget about the freebies you get on the side as well. If you're lucky you'll just be getting a wipe down in future with Nicki Pedersen's snotty blue cloth. Oh and don't forget I could certainly dish out some dirt about you on the forum - stuff that you would rather not be made public. You have been warned so get me what you promised or else. The big question is, who is looking after Gemini's dogs while she is on massage duty?? Don't worry about the dogs as it's all sorted. Srbramble has offered to sit in the car with them all afternoon and evening. Edited July 7, 2010 by Gemini Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandie Posted July 7, 2010 Report Share Posted July 7, 2010 Bloomin 'eck!!! You're scary when you need to be Gem!!! Come on Tibbs - what do you say to that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terry Tibbs Posted July 8, 2010 Author Report Share Posted July 8, 2010 (edited) Bloomin 'eck!!! You're scary when you need to be Gem!!! Come on Tibbs - what do you say to that? Sandie, I'm stranded at the drive in, barnded a fool. Talk to me. Tibbs! I'll you give you Tibbs young Sandie. It's Mr Tibbs or Terry, only people who tickle my chin or give me a little wiggly woo in front of my JVC Video Camera can call me Tibbs. You drive a hard bargain Gemini, most girls would give their right arm to spend the night with Lord Bryn Williams and have Main Man Rogers babysitting their kids. But I like your style, here's the deal, Main Man Rogers will take the dogs for a nice walk round Cardiff City centre whilst you set up in the cubicle in the Prince of Wales toliets. Main Man Rogers has a lot of experience with grooming, particularly young pups. He used to walk that Loof lads dog over the fens in Suffolk, one hundred yards for every point he scored. Poor Dog only walked 400 yards in six months. I've just rung Pav Pavitt, he's done all a deal with all management committee to come and have a lovely oil massage Gemini, after you've rubbed them down they will pop by to Krystof Stojanowski's caravan to pick up a nice laptop supplied by Crouch # Name Removed #. Gemini talk to me, lets do the deal so that you are happy in your massage cubicle at Cardiff on Saturday. I'll give you 15 bags of bakers complete, 5 tins of Winalot and a box of chocolate doggy drops. OK OK, you drive a hard bargain Gemini 20 bags of Bakers, 10 cans of Winalot, two boxes of chocloate doggy drops, one of Lord Bryn Williams' Wulf Sport Jackets, Big Chris' chastity belt, Main Man Rogers' book on how to get the best out German speedway riders, A signed photo of One Dart Pearson, a set of replica Co Stompe darts and one month's free subscription to Pav Pavitt's Premium line services. Don't let me down Gemini, you can even wear your Pink Cowboy hat when Matthew Ford comes in for his rub down. You still want more, OK OK I'll get you the number of Silver Bee's dentist and that's my final offer. Thank you goodnight much love Edited July 8, 2010 by Terry Tibbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemini Posted July 8, 2010 Report Share Posted July 8, 2010 (edited) Bloomin 'eck!!! You're scary when you need to be Gem!!! Come on Tibbs - what do you say to that? Surprised myself as well there Sandie, but I got in touch with a forum member to get some lessons on being more aggressive. I mean anyone who can threaten to punch Ben Barker just because he dared to say her favourite rider was 'past it' has got to be one tough bird. Anyway, Mr Tibbs you know how to get round me don't you? I can't resist all those goodies for the dogs but just make sure Main Man Rogers takes them for a walk round Sophia Gardens as the city centre will be a bit too noisy for them. They like to have a paddle in the river as well. Afterwards just put them in the car where Srbramble will be waiting to look after them. He will already have prepared the car so they don't get too hot - roof open, 4 windows open, cover on, parked in the shade and a nice dish of cold water. I can't thank him enough for being willing to miss the G.P. so he could do this for me. Oh....nearly forgot...I'll give the dentist a miss thanks. You've found my weak spot there. Edited July 8, 2010 by Gemini Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starman2006 Posted July 9, 2010 Report Share Posted July 9, 2010 (edited) Sandie, I'm stranded at the drive in, barnded a fool. Talk to me. Tibbs! I'll you give you Tibbs young Sandie. It's Mr Tibbs or Terry, only people who tickle my chin or give me a little wiggly woo in front of my JVC Video Camera can call me Tibbs. You drive a hard bargain Gemini, most girls would give their right arm to spend the night with Lord Bryn Williams and have Main Man Rogers babysitting their kids. But I like your style, here's the deal, Main Man Rogers will take the dogs for a nice walk round Cardiff City centre whilst you set up in the cubicle in the Prince of Wales toliets. Main Man Rogers has a lot of experience with grooming, particularly young pups. He used to walk that Loof lads dog over the fens in Suffolk, one hundred yards for every point he scored. Poor Dog only walked 400 yards in six months. I've just rung Pav Pavitt, he's done all a deal with all management committee to come and have a lovely oil massage Gemini, after you've rubbed them down they will pop by to Krystof Stojanowski's caravan to pick up a nice laptop supplied by Crouch # Name Removed #. Gemini talk to me, lets do the deal so that you are happy in your massage cubicle at Cardiff on Saturday. I'll give you 15 bags of bakers complete, 5 tins of Winalot and a box of chocolate doggy drops. OK OK, you drive a hard bargain Gemini 20 bags of Bakers, 10 cans of Winalot, two boxes of chocloate doggy drops, one of Lord Bryn Williams' Wulf Sport Jackets, Big Chris' chastity belt, Main Man Rogers' book on how to get the best out German speedway riders, A signed photo of One Dart Pearson, a set of replica Co Stompe darts and one month's free subscription to Pav Pavitt's Premium line services. Don't let me down Gemini, you can even wear your Pink Cowboy hat when Matthew Ford comes in for his rub down. You still want more, OK OK I'll get you the number of Silver Bee's dentist and that's my final offer. Thank you goodnight much love Very good Mr Tibbs you didn't go to the Mark Loram Dinner in Bournemouth back in may, did you?? Edited July 9, 2010 by Starman2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Shovlar Posted July 9, 2010 Report Share Posted July 9, 2010 Sorrry to say my book signing has been cancelled. Very funny TT. Gutted I won't be at Cardiff tomorrow as its the first British GP I have missed for 15 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reckless Eric Posted July 10, 2010 Report Share Posted July 10, 2010 VIP experience talk to me. Terry Tibbs, the owner of the Tibbs Motor Company is providing a VIP experience you will never forget, this Saturday 10th July. The venue Prince of Wales public house, Cardiff. I have some very special guests lined up for the occasion. My great friend Pav Pavitt will be alongside me, Pav Pavitt has more experience of hosting VIP speedway parties then young Benji Barker has pimples on his back. He's a geezer with tasty line schmateh and the spiel to match, Owner of Pav Pavitt Premium Phonelines Limited, you don't just jump into bed with Pav Pavitt, you take Pav Pavitt out to lunch, you wine and dine him, you give him an oil massage and then he gives you one weeks free access to Sky Channel 905, Red Hot Mums! Now talking of red hot mums, my great friend Gemini will be on hand, to give a hand, yes an oily hand to those wanting a little rub down. She is setting up her massage table in the men's toilets, just give my little Nigerian friend £2 for a spray of his Diesel After Shave and he'll let you into the disabled cubicle to meet Gemini. Also in attendance will be Main Man Rogers, a must meet for any youngsters, who need advice and guidance. He's great with kids, if you need a bedtime story read to them, Main man Rogers is your man. Johnny C didn't get to where he was today without Main Man Rogers' stories of Enid Blyton's Famous Five. Alongside Main Man Rogers will be Lord Bryn Williams, he is available to give fashion tips, especially those over 50, who feel they have become a little stale in their Wulf Sport jackets. I've agreed with the landlord of the Prince of Wales that Krzysztof Stojanowski's caravan can be parked in the back garden of the pub, Pav Pavitt is towing it over on the 8.36am ferry from Cowes to Southampton on Saturday and at 2.45pm on Saturday afternoon One Dart Pearson will be sat on the sofa of the caravan accepting visits from excited fans for an autograph. If you are lucky he will give you a signed picture of his great friend Co Stompe the Dutch darting legend. Krzysztof Stojanowski will be available himself for pictures on the camp bed that Lord Bryn Williams kindly donated back in 2005. Pictures will be taken by Lord Bryn Williams' chauffer and aide Big Chris, just £5 each or two for £12. All guests will get free entry to our , second prize a bedtime story with Main Man Rogers and third prize 4 laps on Chris Mills' bike, don't you go twisting the throttle too hard though. The friend of stars Steven Shovlar will be on hand to sign copies of his best sellingpublication Dorset Shipwrecks, price is usually £14.95 but for one day only on Saturday, £18.50 and a you get to sit on Steve Shovlar's lap whilst Big Chris snaps you, if he's busy in Krzysztof Stojanowski's caravan then you'll have to wait and chat with Semion who has kindly offered to take the money on Steve Shovlar's behalf. Entry to my exclusive area is just £250 and that includes a glass of vintage champagne donated by Main Man Rogers he'd bought it for the league title win of the Mildenhall Fen Tigers in 2008, those bloody Germans let him down so badly and don't even speak to him about the Finnish lads. However, if you talk to me, tickle my chin, donate some Vaseline for Gemini, introduce me to the Russian lads' mum I'll let you in for £500. Unless your name's Silver Bee, then entry for you my friend is 50p, as long as you wear your dentures, don't want any of those olives stuck in your teeth do we. No dentures, no entry. That's why they call me Terry Tibbs, much love. Shouldn't that read " Big H " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryn Posted July 10, 2010 Report Share Posted July 10, 2010 (edited) Shouldn't that read " Big H " Indeed not "RE" for my regular chauffeur is indeed Big Chris in whom's company I have travelled the length and breadth of the British Isles over the years to attend speedway meetings and rain offs in his make believe Bentley and seen him take what I would eloquently describe as 'the scenic route' on most occasions diving off motorways at the merest suggestion of a traffic jam ahead. By so doing he has developed an uncanny knack of coming across 24 hour transport cafes in the middle of nowhere where he feels compelled to stop to sample their version of what some might describe as a 'Big Breakfast' with both beans and tomatoes and two toast rather than fried bread. I cannot confirm or deny though whether he has to demolish the plate of food in front of him in under three minutes on the basis of research, the results of which are scheduled to be published in his 2015 British Transport Cafe Guide once he has visited every such establishment in mainland Britain. Alas though I will not be travelling to my homeland in his company later today as I believe he has decided to take his two dogs for a 16 mile walk along the Kent coast so this is to warn everyone, as I think it only fair to do so, that with Big Chris a non-starter, I will instead be travelling in the company of Scary Sheila! You HAVE been warned! One final point, such a shame to read that Shovvy has seemingly been 'confined to barracks' by 'er indoors, she who must be obeyed and thus has had to cancel his proposed book signing. Edited July 10, 2010 by Bryn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Shovlar Posted July 10, 2010 Report Share Posted July 10, 2010 One final point, such a shame to read that Shovvy has seemingly been 'confined to barracks' by 'er indoors, she who must be obeyed and thus has had to cancel his proposed book signing. Sorry to disappoint Bryn but I have a wedding to film today. Took the booking well before the GP date was announced. Gutted I am not going to be there today but business has to come first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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