TotallyHonestJohn

Not so sure... Just had a phone call there and it wont be for the want of trying... However things could look very different for a few months... On the Visa situation I don't think anyone is left here (or stayed during the lock-down) who races on a visa... could be wrong... and on the contract side of things all bets will be off (I imagine) and there will be a re-issuing of contracts for any remainder of the season if it gets going... If and it is a huge "IF"... if things do get started it could be very interesting... Regards THJ

Yep "Sidewinder" and I don't disagree with what you are saying; its no slight on any league or how they are going to operate if they get the chance to and as I opened "Not dismissing Covid" as these are exceptional times; however the point I was trying to make was that we are hearing that the likes of Antonio Lindback; Niki Pedersen and Dan Bewley to name but a few have all flown out to Poland and are self isolating ready to race in the Polish leagues... (could be fake news and it could have been any league not just Poland and again I ain't got no axe to grind with any other league its just the Poles have put their head above the Covid parapet first) and the way I see it is that under the current "Covid" guidelines; those three riders are committing to race in Poland and as you put it, will not be "flitting" about. Quarantine measure just make that unfeasible... So in the case of Niki and Dan they wont be available for their British teams here due to the travel restrictions; which will provide major issues I would suggest for their UK clubs and I don't think they will be the the only riders making tough decisions... so again you may be correct that it may be a moot point that riders go to Poland (or anywhere else for that matter) because we may not get any speedway here and "God" (or even "Rob God-frey") I hope you are wrong too; however I believe it will make things very difficult if we do get the opportunity to go for it; and as I stated that wont be just for riders with Polish teams; Will any Scandinavians just riding in their home leagues and here in the UK not even doing Poland want to move here to ride in the UK rather than stay and ride in their home nation as they will be in the same situation. Denmark locked their airports down two weeks before the UK and who knows when they will lift that restriction because even with the restrictions lifted there will be safety measures introduced such as two weeks self isolation... which will put a total stop to the "flitting" So if we do get any Speedway it could be radically different from what we first expected to see.... also teams could be quite different as well... We may not see any Aussies; Kiwis or Scandinavians and in Newcastle's case a couple of eastern Europeans due to travel restrictions and there will I feel need to be some tough decisions made by all those involved. Stay well; stay safe and look after yourself... Regards THJ

So if the information is correct and Poland is opening up and will be having and running Speedway meetings behind closed doors; and not dismissing Covid we know why they can do this; the sport over there is apparently awash with cash and well supported with riders on good money... So fair play no argument with that... Now I don't normally do this as I do not like trying to second guess what will happen but hang in there... We are hearing that some riders are bailing out of their home nations and heading for Poland where they will do two weeks of self isolation and then they will be good to go racing after doing their quarantine. Also and although not fully known yet; it is being intimated that the UK will also be implementing a two week quarantine period (or self isolation) for anyone coming into the country... (unless from Ireland or France!!!) Now hopefully you can see where I am going here.... where will this leave clubs who have riders (both home based in the UK or Foreign) racing in more than one country (which many riders do these days) and especially in Poland with the pull they have... what will the impact be on the British Leagues where I would suggest clubs can not compete wage wise against our European cousins and obviously riders need to earn like the rest of us... so the riders preference may be to go abroad and staying there for the rest of this season due to the restrictions being applied by various countries... So I would suggest riders (or the better ones) will head off to Poland (for the big bucks) and due to travel restrictions will not be able to country hop as they did in the past and this scenario could last for some time into the future.. maybe and again just a guess; up to the end of the year... So clubs (and to a lesser extent riders) will be placed in a very difficult position. I am not sure if any of the proposed Newcastle side race in any of the Polish Leagues being a Sunday track although some of the lower Polish Leagues race on other nights or if Claus Vissing has a Danish team or Nick and Ondrej race elsewhere but there will be some hard choices to make... other riders like Tero I believe has a Polish side so that may impact Scunny... and clubs with Aussie riders may have issues!!! as will any of those lads come across (or want to for that mater) for what could potentially be a savagely cut back season... So any Championship club (and Premier) running with a Foreign rider could be in a predicament as the rider may have to choose where he wants to race; Home Nation; UK; Poland or any other league that will pay the bills for that matter and to be fair neither the clubs nor the riders are to blame for the situation... but the rider will become in effect "locked in" potentially to the country he chooses to ride in due to quarantining restrictions limiting the travel options... So without the help of a crystal ball the question is "will we get any meaningful racing in the UK this year"? Some hard choices and harder decisions to make to what way Clubs; Riders and the Sport in the UK will jump in this Covid ravaged season... The cup was half full but its evaporating fast... but is there any way out of this situation? Stay well; stay safe and look after yourself... Regards THJ

Honestly Gone a bit slow again so here's a little smile for today and its a true story apparently (Cough Cough) Three couples are trying to get married. Three couples are trying to get married at the same church. There is a young couple, a middle-aged couple, and an elderly couple. The three couples meet with the vicar and discuss when they can get married. "If you wish to get married in my church, you must all go one month without having sex," says the vicar. One month later the three couples return to the church and talk to the vicar. He then asks the elderly couple, "Have you completed the month without sex?" "Yes we have, it was easy," replies the elderly couple. "How about you?" He asks the middle-aged couple. "It was hard, but we didn't have sex for the whole month," they respond. "And how about you two?" He asks the young couple. "No we couldn't do it," responds the boyfriend. "Tell me why," says the vicar. "Well my girlfriend had a tin of beans in her hand and she accidentally dropped it. She bent over to pick it up and that's when it happened." The vicar then tells them, "You're not welcome in my church." "We're not welcome in the supermarket either," says the boyfriend. Boom Boom!!! Stay well; stay safe and look after yourself... Regards THJ

David Bargh before and after Then there was the Milton Keynes Kiwi Jason Bunyan... lol Regards THJ

So after that nice little bit of Speedway chat we seem to have cooled off slightly again therefore to bring the SMILE back to everyone's faces again (or in ruffdiamond's case another groan) in our Covid impacted lives how about these offerings. (and only because Donald has got the USA in the news) A man is walking through his local shopping mall in the USA and notices a Mexican book store. He decides to go in because he has never seen a Mexican book store before. He browses through the store and finally asks the clerk, "Do you have the book on Donald Trump's foreign policies with Mexico?" The clerk replies, "F#ck you, get out and stay out!" The man replies, "Yeah, that's the one!" So the Pope is SUPER early for his flight from the USA back to the Vatican. He asks his driver on his way to the airport if he could drive around for a while because they have time to kill and he hasn't driven a car since becoming the pope. Naturally, he's a bit rusty, so he's driving poorly, when suddenly he sees police lights behind him. He pulls over and when the officer comes up to the window his eyes go wide. He says to the pope "Hold on for a minute," and goes back to his car to radio the chief. Cop: "Chief we have a situation. I've pulled over an important figure." Chief: "How important? A governor or something?" Cop: "No sir. He's bigger." Chief: "So, what? A celebrity or a footballer or something?" Cop: "More important, sir." Chief: "A major politician?" Cop: "No sir, he's much more important." Chief: "WELL WHO IS IT!?" Cop: "Well actually I'm not sure. But the pope's his driver." Now get back to the Speedway related banter or I will drop another one in... Stay well; stay safe and look after yourself... Regards THJ

On Ivan's last visit to the UK to promote his book around 2010/11 "Ivan Mauger: The Will to Win: The Autobiography" I bought myself a copy and in there he said "if you can ride Brough Park you can ride any track in the world" and that was when the track was not only longer than today's track but approximately a whole lane narrower and the bends didn't really open out as much as they do now... so much more of a trick track back then I would say. The best laugh was I was standing in the pits with Kenni Larsen whilst Dalbers was interviewing Ivan on the centre green and he asked "Well Ivan what do you think of the track these days" Ivan's response was "you've ruined the place! you've made it far to easy to get round now" and Kenni turned round and said "whose this old nutter who thinks this is an easy track to ride" and when I explained who Ivan was and what he had done winning six world titles and when at Newcastle had an average of over 11 points... Kenni who had never heard of him previously was in awe of the guy and by the end of the interview was well impressed... Kenni even had a chat with him later on in the meeting and Ivan said he was impressed with Kenni's starting ability and his style on a bike. (which I think was fair praise indeed) Great talent Ivan and a true speedway legend sadly missed (and on the track side of things at Newcastle you could say the same about Kenni) Regards THJ

Am guessing either 1. No one else wanted him 2. No one could fit him in because of his average. 3. Newcastle offered him so much money that greed got the better of him and he chased the filthy lucre even though he isn't keen on the track... Just guessing like... Or as an edit 4. maybe he came to Newcastle to master a track that he has on occasions struggled at... and maybe he thought he would end up a better rider... Danes do have a penchant for making a name for themselves at Newcastle... maybe his reason for coming was totally honourable... Yep a like that reason better... Regards THJ

Funny that as just before the lock down we had a chat with Dan on Row Brow opposite the Old Mill Inn pub in Dearham... he was told to get a hair cut as well... he was out in his push bike getting some fitness training in and at the bottom of Row Brow hill just about to go up it when we nearly knocked him over... oops... had a good craic and hes another nice kid... his old man "Neil Boozer Bewley" is a good un too with worse jokes than me... Honest... Regards THJ

Am in me 50's so am not that far behind you... but if any one asks am 39... going on 14... At the minute everyday is Christmas Day with this lock down... boring... it's driving me nuts... and no av not opened any whiskey in the last couple of weeks funnily enough... pienpeesman mentioned the other day along with Ruffdiamond that they both were giving the gin a go... so I cracked a bottle of Tanqueray the other night as I hadn't had a G&T for a while and to be fair av quite enjoyed it... saying it's a girls drink... Regards THJ

Hey... Speak for ya sel Marra I might not have much to cut these days but possessing my own "Wahl Clippers" what I do have gets a good clipping every three weeks... Old habits die hard and with our old RSM if he could pinch any ov it outside the beret he pulled it out... So no thank you to the "Scruffy Old Mop" / "Rasta" look and looking at Richards dad (Steve) who still has a full hair line although well cropped currently; Richard wont be going bald anytime soon... can you imagine that weave in white... could be the new Roy Wood or Santa Claus look... Know you don't like Christmas getting a mention too early gazzac and only 246 days to go so sorry for the Santa reference... But I suppose it will keep him warm on cold winter nights so I will give you that... Honestly just had another look at a current photo and I'm now not sure if its a "Rasta" or "Predator" look he is going for... Also how does all that fit under a helmet? Does he take the liner out ffs? Either way I still think it looks a clip... Sorry... Regards THJ

He's still wearing it.... Just all the hair has grow through it... Honestly he used to be a tidy kid but he could do wid a hair cut that's for sure... Smart lad when hes been clipped and shaved... looks a scruffy get nowadays!!! Always thought Maryport was famous for the "Jam Factory" not its Rastafarian's... Freddie Notes & The Rudies sang about Montego Bay not Maryport Bay... Never mind at least we know its not Richard hoarding all the soap,,, Regards THJ

Jenga is correct there was one but just like Jason it got a bit naughty on there so it was canned... There will be more to come out but it will be a case of wait and see I would suggest... Regards THJ

A used to cough to hide a fart.... Now a fart to hide a cough.... Cough cough... Regards THJ

Morning, So here is today's offering to keep us smiling through the pain One day, Einstein has to speak at an important science conference. On the way there, he tells his driver that looks a bit like him: "I'm sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!" The driver agrees: "You're right. As your driver, I attended all of them, and even though I don't know anything about science, I could give the conference in your place." "Hey... That's a great idea!" says Einstein. "Let's switch places then!" So they switch clothes and as soon as they arrive, the driver dressed as Einstein goes on to the stage and starts giving the usual speech, while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it. But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won't be able to respond. So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question. The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response. The driver looks at him, dead in the eye, and says: "Sir, your question is so easy to answer that I'm going to let my driver reply to it for me." All true apparently (cough cough) Regards THJ

See the club have put a statement out; just a sensible one liner keeping there distance at present not wanting to comment which I think is the best approach under the current circumstances... Feel a bit for Brum; lost half a team with injuries early on last year and it looks like they have lost a second rider this; after THJ bailed due to fixture clashes and both through no fault of their own making... before a wheel is turned (if we ever get to see a wheel turning this year that is) Regards THJ

Just been reading Jason Garrity has been a naughty boy... Looks like he will be doing some compulsory social distancing and social isolating at Her Majesty's pleasure... What a tool... and a waste of a talent... Regards THJ

Ave got something like 40 bottles but every so often one springs a leak from the top and has to be consumed... Funny that... Doh... Regards THJ

Well ave got an unopened one too as it happens from a guy I helped to get a job with a good reference but I have had it before and it wasn't to bad... bout 25 quids worth and fair play to the lad he's trying... like the thing I am watching now it's a starter for 10... you could have a good one there... ideal for wetting the head of the first grandchild and don't worry it won't go off... Never mind the daughter he's a keeper if he's buying you drink... Regards THJ

Honestly I've never had it; few years back now coming through Singapore I was twiddling my thumbs for a couple of hours and went for a mooch round the duty free shops seeing if I could pick up a bottle of something on the cheap, and there wasn't a Japanese whisky under £200 quid so that put me off. I ended up with a Johnnie Walker 3 pack special of a Black Label; Green Label and a Blue Label which cost £150 quid; but as I say the Japanese Whisky was hellish expensive. Before Christmas I looked in The Whisky Shop in the Metro Centre and the cheapest one they had in the spot was £130:00 and when I asked about the price the guy said they were expecting to get some in at around the £40 quid mark but I haven't been back since to see what it is. Don't know if you have ever had Laphroaig but its definitely an acquired taste and Charles prefers the the 15-Year variety. Which I think they stopped making the 15 Year Variety so he bought something like the last 500 bottles or some ridiculous amount like that he also likes a Bruichladdich which is another "smokey" one. I don't think you can go past Glenfiddich or a Glenlivet for me and the Johnie Walker brands are all quaff-able as I don't think I have had a poor one and as a slurping Whisky well Bells takes some beating not as harsh I don't think as Grouse or some of the other competitors. Regards THJ

Honestly That's sacrilege... there is nothing finer than a single malt whisky; definitely the poison of my choice... Actually I am not a Whisky snob as there are a few good blended whiskies too.... and with most of the Irish Whiskies being distilled three times rather than twice they also have a nice mellow taste... Distilling three times tends to produce a lighter and smoother spirit The only Whisky I couldn't defend is Prince Charles favourite and that is Laphroaig which is definitely an acquired taste; I generally prefer my Scotch from the East Coast rather than the West where the water is filtered through Granite rather than Peat. The Whisky I was after this year was the one produced at the Lakes Distillery at Setmurthy; Cockermouth, Near Bassenthwaite Lake as I done the tour of the Distillery in 2018 and their single malt was just about ready when we done the tour; then when I went back this year they had sold out of the stuff... Doh!!!... gutted.... Regards THJ

Well you can sleep easier with the light on... and I bet you cant remember the last time you were hard!!! Or you could pee easier with the light on? you would be okay because you sit down... Regards THJ

Honestly The Scots spell it whisky and the Irish spell it whiskey, with an extra 'e'. This difference in the spelling comes from the translations of the word from the Scottish and Irish Gaelic forms. Whiskey with the extra 'e' is also used when referring to American whiskies. Although Bourbon is a definite poor version of the stuff in my humble opinion... You will find the Irish and the Yanks spell it Whiskey whereas anyone else in the world who produces Whisky spells it well... Whisky without the "E" So the spelling whisky is generally used for whiskies distilled in Scotland, Canada, Australia, Japan and Europe, while whiskey is used for the spirits distilled in Ireland and America and has nothing to do with the grains used. By lad learning as well... oh the joy... Regards THJ

Wrong and Wrong Sorry chaps both wrong... so no prize there then... that's saved as buying a coconut... The difference is an "E" Regards THJ

Morning Saying that someone recklessly mentioned Christmas the other day (only 249 days to go! Yeah!!!) here's a couple of corona virus smiles for today? A Christmas bonus so to speak... A poor man meets a rich man around Christmas. The poor man asks the rich man, "What are you getting your wife this Christmas?" The rich man replies, "Diamond earrings and a Mercedes." The poor man asks, "Why are you getting her two gifts?" The rich man says, "Well, if she doesn't like the earrings then she can drive to the store and exchange them." The poor man nods. Then the rich man asks him, "So what are you getting your wife this year?" The poor man thinks about it for a second and replies, "A pair of slippers and a dildo." The rich man asks, "Why those two things?" The poor man astutely responds, "This way, if she doesn't like the slippers she can go f#ck herself." A Mormon and an Irishman are on a plane. A Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight from London to the US. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me, too, I didn't know we had a choice." Both quite true I am led to believe (cough cough) and on a more serious note and as a bonus quiz question does anyone know the difference between Irish and Scottish Whiskies... Stay well; stay safe and look after yourself... Regards THJ