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If you go to Manchester velodrome any young kid can hire a bike and have a go on the track in a taster session to see if they like it. If they do, they can take up the sport and some of the youngsters that started this way have gone right to the top of the sport. Speedway tracks need to adopt the same thinking and get youngsters in on low powered machines and in a controlled environment to bring forward naturally talented youngsters. You can't just sit back and wait for divine intervention or some opportunity to bend the rules to save having to make too much effort.

So it'll probably come down to who turns up with the snazziest race suit and has a good grasp of foreign languages

So the moral of the story is get your team put together early doors and spend some time and effort bringing local youngsters into the sport. If you do these things then you probably won't have to attempt to bend the rules to get one over on the teams who believe in the rules as written and equally importantly have some idea of the spirit of the rules. Do zobaczenia

I wasn't actually being serious. I was extracting the urine.

So when did he first apply for a British passport? If he has been living here for years then surely he is not only just getting round to banging his application in.

I shall watch for you jumping up and down and cheering loudly after heat 2.

Is that right? So do you reckon his passport has now arrived or is it still lost in the Christmas post? Surely, Birmingham would realize that a move like that would be resented by many fans or are they trying to woo potential Polish punters through the turnstiles?

That can't be right, can it? But then he has ridden in the MDL for Coventry in 2016 and I notice it said next to his name "awaiting British passport". Kyle Roberts was in the same MDL squad So his passport has probably now arrived and he is as British as the rest of us.

Well, I have booked my seat for Good Friday when Coventry come to visit. Kean only has to beat the likes of Ryan MacDonald and Jamie Halder, so no problem there then.

This gets more depressing by the minute! Surely, if he's that poor then his dad should have had a word in his ear and suggested taking up football or some other namby pamby sport instead. It'll be a bit embarrassing if he's half a lap behind in the reserves race.

Wow, that's depressing. Hope he's been doing a lot of practice over the winter months.

So, why have BV taken him on? Perhaps they know something that is not evident to us mere mortals. If they had not taken K. Dicken, who could they have had instead?

Any old-timers that could be tempted away from their slippers and pipe? Oops sorry. Didn't mean to use the "P" word.

So did the lad ride again in 2017 or was the Brum press and practice débâcle the sum total of it? And by the way, matey, we aren't going to finish in the bottom 2 so you'll have to look for someone else to help you prop up the foot of the table.

So, does anybody think that young Kean Dicken has the ability to make the grade? Has anyone seen him ride and did they get the impression that he has a talent that is waiting to burst out in a Bewleyesque fashion? When I saw young Bewley first ride, it was obvious that he had a huge natural talent. I must admit that I have some doubts if Master Dicken is quite ready for this and I just hope he doesn't do himself some damage.

What would the rider do where he rode for two or more clubs? How many suits would he need to buy? Personally, I think that leather is a better material with regards to protection and that textile suits are only favoured by teams as they are a better advertising space.

There are very few speedway outfits in this country that have the ability or the inclination to do things properly. That nice Mr Hammond says that he has no plans to change his policy away from austerity. The beatings will continue until morale improves. So let's keep things simple, let's keep things cost-effective and let's try and keep speedway alive by not spending money that doesn't need to be spent.

If your argument for kevlar suits is safety then surely you should be arguing for airbag suits such as those made by Dianese and Alpinestars, as used by Marquez, Rossi and Dovi? Incidentally, I've never seen anyone who has had their arse torn off and I've seen quite a lot of motorbike crashes but perhaps I need to get out more. What's better for a club to be professional looking and broke or a bit less scrubbed and polished but solvent?

It is being suggested that these suits can cost around £1000. If that's the case, I'm not sure that any level of British speedway should be frittering their money or more accurately, their customers' money, on such unnecessary items.

Anybody know how much these race suits cost? I am sure that for the top tier clubs that appear on the goggle box, then for the sake of a professional appearance then the cost can be justified. Assuming that they cost around a couple of hundred quid each then for a NL side suits are surely a no goer since £1500 is a big chunk of the budget to blow on an unnecessary vanity item. Personally, I like riders showing a bit of individuality and also promoting their own sponsors a bit. Fringes on the sleeves of leather race suits always looked pretty trick, don't you think? If you go too far down the corporate avenue, then all the riders will be dressed identically and referring to each other as colleagues.

Wow! Look at the expression on Wilkie's face. You can see why it's taking 3 blokes to hold him back. Great days when people had a bit of passion for what they did rather than constantly thinking how much money they can screw out of it. Anybody who can identify all the riders gets a bonus point.

A free brew at the "press and practice" day would be a good start. I went a couple of years ago and it was all pretty embarrassing. There might have been 20 or so supporters there listening to the riders telling us how they were going to be the team to beat. Even Ben Wilson sounded a tad unconvincing. It was freezing cold outside and it was even more freezing cold inside the Loomer Road "restaurant" building. Then of course, there was all the usual guff from messers Tattum and Vasey about how the glory days for the Potters were just round the corner. The smell of brewing coffee at least offered some comfort to the bored rigid fans who would soon have to go outside and be the frozen rigid fans watching the latest band of Potters mercenaries do a couple of pointless laps each. You might have expected that as a gesture of goodwill to the hardy souls who had pitched up for this sham, then at least the Potters' coffers might have stretched to a bit of hot water and a few cheapo coffee granules. The outstretched, taloned hand of Mrs T indicated that you get nowt for free at Gloomy Road. I wouldn't mind but it was a pretty sh*t cup of coffee. I watched a few minutes of riders taking it in turns to have a spurt around the uneven surface that was pretending to be a track. The young lad who had trolled all the way down from Scotland with his dad and was meant to be one of the reserves went out twice, fell off twice and was never seen again. I mounted up, rode out and vowed that would be the last of those that I would be pitching up to. A press and practice day is surely a great opportunity for promoters to get the fans involved, give 'em a free brew and make them feel involved with the club that they try and support. Perhaps now that Stoke have a "commercial manager", this year's jamboree might have something of a more professional and inclusive feel to it and hopefully, should anyone decide to go along, they might be kind enough to let us know how it pans out.

That is most helpful, Philip. I shall send for a copy without delay.

Hey Argos, do you enjoy your visits to Loomer Road? Every track has it's good points, so I'll list one good point and you tell us some of the other things you like about Stoke:- 1. Excellent track shop run by nice people. ok, over to you Argy:- 2. 3.

I don't think they actually print them out. You just pull up at Gloomy Road's gates, wink at the 2 happy souls who hover about there and tell 'em your a mate of Dave's. They wave you straight into the executive car park and your reserved seats are polished and waiting for you. What's not to like?