King Jamie

Children's evening at sunny Armadale brought chaos on and off the track last night. On track, incidents and delays were the main dish on offer while, off it, almost 3 million whippersnappers ran amok, obviously desperate to sample the delights of West Lothian's plushest venue before it changes ownership. And enjoy a shot on the bouncy castle of course. The meeting did have a number of noticeable achievements. Josh Pickering returned to his unbeaten best with a dominant performance and Jacob Hook bagged his first (and second) win(s) for the club. His reserve partner, young Blair, unfortunately wasn't aboard a weapon of mass destruction (or, looking at his scorechart, perhaps he was). Overshadowing all of these, however, was young Fredriksen who notched his first paid maximum in Monarchs colours, despite being used as a human skittle by his jealous opponents. Firstly, soap dodging guest Brennan dumped him off in true Martin Dugard / Sean Wilson fashion after a tight finish in heat 1. Then James Shanes completed his bulldozing expedition in heat 6 with a game of wipe out before exiting stage left in a cream puff. There was an announcement over the tannoy requesting the removal of a white van. Perhaps Shanes volunteered is do it with his bare hands. Of the other Brummies, the missing Vissing was ably covered (not sure the bar enjoyed being left with 300 unsold cans of Irn Bru though), Nielsen was very lucky to not only avoid exclusion from heat 8 but also still (hopefully) be in one piece, Sedgy looked edgy and young Morris will be dancing all the way to the Bank after his double figure return. Roll on Friday. It's the Weegies again. Joy...

Just prior to former director Brian Gray's death, was there not talk of a field for use as a training track? I've no idea where it was, or indeed the finer details, but could that be a potential avenue to explore?

An eventful evening at sunny Armadale. Dust in heat one. Who'd have thunk it? Schoolboy error watering immediately before heat 2, although we'll never know if it contributed to the crash. Speedy recovery to young Sarj. I doubt he'll be changing many nappies for a while. Two blips on the Masters scorechart. Firstly at the 10th, when Erik Riss blew him a kiss and left him trailing. Then on the final hole, there was another episode of Sleepy Sam, when Lewis Kerr was allowed to go right round him. Overall acceptable, but still room for improvement there. Much better from the others though. The Italian plumber certainly had the hot tap turned on last night. The switch to number 4 appeared to have worked wonders. Leaving without a point may well have been hard to Bear for the visitors but, ultimately, they only have themselves to blame by getting their Wright guest wrong. And what has happened to Kasper Andersen? He was dreadful. Finishing on a positive, special mention to Ben Morley who has always a competent performer on smaller circuits, without ever looking spectacular. Well done. Roll on Friday. Brum Brum and all that...

British Speedway has Rowe on 3.86. However, the Leicester team total is 41.62, so enough room for a potential replacement slightly above that mark. Obviously the figures will change on 1 May...

While you're quick to call out the bottom end, are you not concerned about the top end too? Take Sam Masters. After an excellent heat 1 and an untroubled heat 6, he promptly won just one of his last four outings (a race he shouldn't even have been in). Following on from the previous home meeting, he's now won just 4 of his last 12 races at sunny Armadale. That is, quite frankly, not good enough and it puts extra pressure on those further down. He's supposed to be the best rider in the league but, put him out against half decent opposition and he's continually found wanting. He even gave up in one race on Friday. Can't remember if it was 13 or 15 but he visibly stopped trying and piddled round in a safe second place. I don't pay to watch that. I want 100% effort at all times. We're also not going to win (m)any meetings when our second heat leader only scores 7 from 4. At least Josh is entertaining though. Moving on to the bottom five, their collective lack of track time isn't exactly helping their cause (Masters and Pickering don't have that problem). The make-up of the side also isn't right. In hot and cold Castagna, we have a third heat leader who was a reserve last season. Hardly his fault if he's not up to it on a consistent basis. The glue that is Kye Thomson continues to be the case. He's steadily doing a reasonable job again but also appears expected to pick up the slack from the low scoring number 3. A farcical situation. Lasse Fredriksen is finding points difficult to come by in the top 5. Again, hardly a shock. Even the haywire Hungarian struggled first time round in 2010. Jacob Hook has done his job. A third place in each and every heat two. There's consistency for you! His development will be interesting to watch as the season goes on. And then there's Sarj. All I will say is I hope Friday was a one off.

Friday the 13th lived up to its name as the Monarchs delivered a truly dreadful performance. The evening got off to the worst possible start as the lack of pre meeting parade meant we couldn't boo Richie Worrall and things didn't improve with James Sarjeant doing his best Justin Elkins impression throughout. Having fallen 6 points behind, heat 6 looked the ideal opportunity to hit back straight away. That is, of course, unless you're the Monarchs management, who promptly left the lineup as per programme. The resulting 4-2 meant the gap was closed. However, somewhat embarrassingly, it only went the other way thereafter. The tactical substitute eventually arrived in heat 11, as Jacob was Hooked and replaced by another Aussie who was only marginally better on the night. As the Lions roared away into the distance (hats off for an excellent team display), the home fans yearned for better days ahead. Team changes were tentatively mentioned in conversation. One or two are unhappy with the Italian plumber, who obviously left his best bikes at Eurovision. Sadly though, it seems young Fredriksen is the most likely candidate for the chop. Should that happen, let's just hope we don't involve Police Scotland. They don't exactly have a particularly good record when it comes to Lasses. Roll on next Friday. Hopefully we might score 40 for a change...

Is "Hemelec Limited" still the experts of choice these days?

Castagna 0 Thomson 2 Pijper 3 Flint 1 There appeared to be a bit of a mix-up as to whether second place was Kye Thomson or Michele Castagna. It was definitely Thomson though.

It's not exactly a new thing. Take the last 3 home meetings from last season: Glasgow KOC (55-35). Sam 2 Josh 1, total just 3 from 9 rides, despite the large margin of victory. Glasgow POSF (47-43). Sam 2 Josh 0, total 2 from 9 rides. Poole KOC (43-47). Sam 2 Josh 0, total 2 from 9 rides. Add in Friday night (2 from 10 rides) and it would seem that certain so-called top riders struggle when facing difficult opposition. Or, put it another way, perhaps they're not actually as good as everyone seems to think they are. A case of 'tough Cookie' perhaps?

A race is going until such point as it is stopped (as in, when the red lights go on). The referee decides upon their decision at that time. As a general rule, if there is an incident involving two riders, if the fallen rider is at fault, the ref will let the race continue and give him a chance to clear the track. If he fails to do so, then the red lights will come on. In the interim, the lead may well have changed hands. That's racing, and hats off to whoever finished first. On the other hand, should the referee feel the fallen rider has been knocked off, the red lights should come on immediately and the offender excluded. All of the above gets confusing slightly in that, if the incident takes place on lap 2, the ref can make a decision but delay pressing the red lights until the leading rider crosses the line into lap 3. They can then exclude the rider deemed to be the cause of the stoppage and award the race. This is probably more likely to happen in the event of a 5-1. I also think I'm right in saying lap 3 awardings are quite rare. Could be wrong on that though, as I don't keep those types of stats!

I didn't see the incident last night but a referee is entitled to give 'all 4 back' at any point during the race, regardless of which lap they're on

Heat 13 last night.: Sam Masters Josh Pickering Matthew Wethers William Lawson Possibly one of the highest totals of cumulative laps completed at sunny Armadale between all 4 riders in one race?

Re the number of ambulances, Edinburgh were caught out late last season when James Sarjeant crashed. We all stood around for what felt like more than an hour while treatment took place and the promised replacement was diverted to another emergency. I'm not sure if we only had one ambulance on site all season but there were two on show for the remaining few meetings thereafter. This season, I can't say with 100% certainty, but I did see two leave the stadium last night. Re readmission prices, those same terms are quoted on the Edinburgh website. However, I think I'm right in saying we still adopt the older version whereby, for example, if a meeting gets abandoned after heat 3, you pay £3 the following week. I most certainly wouldn't pay £10 for 2 heats. I would simply choose to deliberately miss a meeting at some point instead. That said, I do understand the concept of fixed costs. Therefore, I can see where the policy is coming from. As a paying customer, it wouldn't make me feel any less ripped off though. Speedy recovery to Joshua Auty.

Jacob has done an excellent job so far, simply by scoring in every heat 2. The number 6 berth is notoriously difficult, with the chances of further points severely restricted thereafter.

It's the training track for the academy youngsters who are learning their trade aboard the very small bikes

RIP Mr Pearson. Whilst obviously no consolation whatsoever, at least he was able to pass at a time when his beloved Team GB are World Champions. (not entirely sure I worded that entirely correctly, but I know what I meant). Condolences to family and friends.

A couple of points re the programme ('match magazine'?)... The front cover didn’t mention what type of fixture it was. Neither did the centre pages. Was last night actually a Challenge match? Also, as enjoyable as the puzzles were on page 32, the fact the answers were shown on page 24 meant they probably weren't as challenging as they otherwise might've been Other than that, top marks. Keep up the hard work!

A major shock (RIP Nigel Pearson) was followed by a pleasant surprise, as Monarchs took all the Championship points on offer. The top two were virtually untouchable which, in Josh Pickering's case, is probably just as well, otherwise there could've been carnage. That heat 15 move took me back to when Lee Complin flew round Fredrik Lindgren in the final of the Garry Stead Grand Prix. Unbelievable, but brilliant at the same time. Young Fredriksson became the first Lasse to score a point for the Monarchs. A very promising debut there, including a race win. He even pushed Ricky Wells all the way in heat 6, but there was Norway through on that occasion. As for young Michele, he looks to be creating an interesting inside line for himself. Once that's perfected, we'll need to rename him Carr-stagna. For the disappointing Bandits, the type two diabetic spent most of the evening chasing shadows, Proctor showed his inclusion was a Gamble, Pijper bagged a decent score, the Kiwi looked ok, but was nowhere to be seen in 13 and 15, and Dame Edna wasn't as strong at reserve as I'd been expecting. Roll on Friday. Here's to another 50 points...

Sunny Armadale will be living up to its name tomorrow night. Decent temperatures too. I'm contemplating wearing shorts.

The opening night of the season at sunny Armadale saw beautiful weather (as always) and the biggest win by any Berwick side at the Cardiffesque Caldron. The Devils appeared to be doing their bit for the environment by not going too fast, while the Bullets ignored this brainwashing narrative and shot past their opponents as and when necessary, the tone set as early as heat one with Kyle Bickley going very quickly in a last to first dash. However, even he was overshadowed by the exploits of young Ace Pijper, the only rider to lower the 60 seconds barrier and thus become the fastest rider of 2022 so far. Sam Masters et al, it's over to you to beat it. At the end of the night, the visitors celebrated like they'd won the SoN. And why not? For riders such as Luke Crang and Greg Blair, they'll look back on this as the pinnacle of their careers, winning handsomely at such a plush venue. Friday coming sees the other Berwick mob descend (or, geographically speaking, ascend) on the What The Fork Wastelands. I'm gonna say, right here, right now, they won't score 52. They might get 53 though...

Glasgow's team total is 41.99, not 42.00, not that it matters as 42.00 is still acceptable. Green sheet averages only go to 2 decimal places. At the beginning of a season, if 2 or more riders are on the same (usually assessed) average, the team management declares the seniority of the riders. Thereafter, when the averages change, if there are 2 or more 'tied', the previous seniority is the prevailing factor.

The 4th emergency service?

So, Fireman Sam and Doctor Hook. Just need a Police Sarjeant and we'll have the full house.

Is this one of those sensationalised news reports to appease the fanbase or can we expect to hear a hitman has finished his career in the near future? Quite honestly, he's right to leave if his boss insists on repeatedly calling him "Ben". Show some respect. The name's Benjamin.

The very same one!